My Impressions at the Oscars

I just finished watching the Oscar Awards and it was predictably another vapid experience taking up too many hours of my life. Nevertheless it left me some impressions and some awards of my own.
First, I reiterate that this has been the best movie season in the past decade. Consider Milk, Defiance, Changling, Doubt, The Reader, Benjamin Button, Dark Night, Slum Dog, The Wrestler, and Frost/Nixon plus foreign films Departures and Waltzing with Bashir. I have only seen a few so my home video rental list is full. Also since most titles have only one or two words they are easier to remember.
Second, the actors of my generation are getting older. And so am I! The actors of my generation are getting fatter. And so am I!
Third, the most deserved Oscar was to Sean Penn for a superb performance and a great body of work. Kate Winslet is the new Meryl Streep. Meryl Streep was elegant. I had the good fortune to meet her on the street some years ago. We spoke briefly and I assure everyone that she is as gracious in person. For me it was a memorable moment.
My annoyances: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie look happily married. What am I going to believe when I read the yellow magazines as I check out of Jewel? Goldie Hawn was coming out of her dress while staying in one place. Armpits are not in fashion with sleeveless dresses. It is OK to dress like an adult. Same for Sara Jessica Parker. When you are approaching 50 you look foolish wearing your hair like a 20 year-old. Ben Stiller is not funny. No surprise. Who is Natalie Beade? Was she wearing 2 dresses at one time or did I have double vision. Most undeserved award was best film for Slumdog. This is a story! No character development. No theme. Ridiculous ending. An anti-intellectual award if ever I saw one.
Class Act: Jerry Lewis and a lifetime of giving, especially for Muscular Dystrophy. He is an example for us all. Sophia Lauren. She is still one of my fantasy loves. Did you notice her phenomenal figure. OK, so the face doesn’t move when she talks. Neither did Howdie Doody’s. Hugh Jackman. I didn’t know who he is. This guy is extremely talented and why didn’t he get the male lead in Mama Mia instead of the hoax with Pierce Brosnan who I otherwise like very much.
Fashion Statement: Big hips are in, short waisted dresses are in. As I have taught hormone changes with pre and post menopause produce larger breasts, larger shoulders, and bigger arms in women. I don’t find them unattractive, but I am not sure that the presenting ladies were so aware with so many sleeveless and shoulderless dresses. The best news is that anorexia is out. And this was a good time to note that all of the women who put on some weight looked younger! A round face and hair off the face is a prescription for loss of 10 years of aging.
Hope you enjoyed.
Edward Lack MD Plastic Surgery in Chicago

Musings: Latisse, Multivitamins, Nurse Doctors, Free Botox

Latisse is the one of the few of a line of cosmetic products that actually works. Bimatoprost ophthalmic solution does grow eyelashes, makes them thicker, and sometimes makes them darker in the vast majority of users. The drops are placed on the eyelashes of the upper eyelid nightly for 4 months. Thereafter it will be placed on the eyelash up to several times per week. If patients decide to discontinue its usage they will only lose eyelashes they have newly grown according to the manufacturer, Allergan. As this is a prescription drug it will be dispensed by physicians. Patients will need to visit the physician and have a simple history filled out to avoid complications due to pre-existing illness. Cost to the patient is $120.00 every 2 months for a total of 4 months and much less thereafter.

Multivitamins were slammed this week in medical journals as more evidence emerges that they do not cleanse the body, do not energize the body, do not prevent cancer. Use in nutritionally deficient patients is still recommended. The toxins that some physicians and manufacturers describe are located between their ears and can be eradicated by shutting their mouths!

When I feel a cold coming on and I want a placebo I take 2000mg of Vitamin C. It usually works in 12-24 hours.

Does anyone care that antioxidants function by neutralizing superoxides and then convert to oxidants themselves. While antioxidants can improve DNA self healing repair, as from sun damage, mostly they function in the test tubes of cosmetic companies where their addition to cosmeceuticals provides great grist for marketing departments.

Nurses in several states will soon be able to get a certificate that allows them to place Dr. in front of their names. Put a stethoscope around their necks and they meet all the criteria for impersonating an MD. How will patients know the difference? Several months ago Dr. Rachel solved the problems of a patient diagnosed with a tumor invading her brain. The “tumor” turned out to be ear wax. If you did not guess the 2 “doctors” who both diagnosed and evaluated the problem were a Nurse Practitioner and a Physician’s Assistant. The patient’s portion of the bill for her initial evaluation before the ear wax removal was 5000.00. Is this part of the new administration’s plan for reducing the cost of health care?

We have the lowest aptitude and achievement tests for students below the age of 18 of the 7 most successful industrialized nations in the world. Our health care statistics are abominable compared to our European counterparts. China is the most successful capitalist economy at this time. Yet we are still consumed with fear of educational standards and universal health care masquerading as socialism.

On a lighter note the airports are empty and I have not experienced a long line at security in many months. This was the best movie season in perhaps the past decade. We are extending our offer for free botox for one cosmetic area with the purchase of one syringe of filler to an additional 25 patients.

Happy Post Valentine’s Day.
Edward Lack MD www.metropolitanmds.com

YOUR MAKE-UP MASK MAY REVEAL A STORY YOU DON’T MEAN TO TELL

My wife returned from Sweden this week. She told me of seeing 2 beautiful young Swedish women walking down the street. They were dressed smartly and coiffured accordingly. But when she got close she noticed both ladies had thick coats of make-up on their faces that would have been comical had these women not been so obvious in wanting to appear attractive.
The art of make-up goes back thousands of years when colorful adornment was an artful addition to celebrations. It has a centuries old use in performance as exaggeration enhances the story being portrayed by the performing characters. In theater and more importantly in motion pictures where lighting blanched the skin of the performers colorful make-up highlighted the subjects and made them more vivid and believable. As incandescent dim lighting evolved the use of make-up as part of evening-ware was thought to be alluring and feminine.
Enter the 1920’s and the glorification of sun-tanned skin, and make-up became derigueur as necessary as clothing in the light of day. In fact it was even essential as a cover-up when clothing was scantily worn or not worn at all. In the light of day, or with fluorescent lighting for that matter, foundation make-ups appear cakey and grainy. With aging and sun damage and resultant large pores the granules of make-up fill the pores making skin look pitted and rough.
What we have here is a self-fulfilling prophesy. I need make-up to look good so I don’t look good if I don’t wear make-up. This ignores the obvious detraction of foundation make-up which makes skin look aged and artificial.
I offer a deal to every new patient: if I can clear your skin flaws, will you stop wearing foundation make-up. And if that is too emotionally challenging, at least switch to bronzing gels which alter the hue of the skin without making it look unreal.
If you have read Blink, you know that your face transmits a multitude of information in the gestalt of a moment. Will you communicate Mardi Gras or a warm and friendly countenance when you next greet someone.
P.S. Latisse, the FDA approved topical eyelash growth drug is now available. It will be distributed through doctors offices. This one really works so if you want thicker eyelashes, the technology is now available. Treatment consists of nightly applications of the liquid for 8 weeks followed by some regimen of reduced long term care. I will be trying it on some patients with thin eyebrows. Early reports are positive.
Edward Lack, MD www.metropolitanmds.com